A question that is not commonly asked, but can be most revealing is, “How is your heart doing these days?”
First off, most people would not even know how to answer this question. Many would think you are asking about their cardiovascular status, while others would awkwardly look down and quickly ponder an answer that can help them escape the discomfort they feel.
But what most of us do is scan a list of other questions we might imagine are tied to the “how’s your heart” question. They reveal what we spend most of our attention, focus and investment on:
- How much money am I making? How is business?
- Am I looking successful?
- What does my spiritual/religious activity look like?
- How does our family look to everyone?
- How are my social media interactions going?
- Am I getting good feedback on the things that I do?
- How good do I look in a bathing suit? Have I lost the weight I want to lose?
- Are my kids involved in lots of activities and showing that I am a good parent?
- How do I look as I am answering this question?
These questions lead us on a trail to nowhere, linking us to values that don’t enhance the life of our hearts. They also tie us to a standard that is not based on things that are genuinely important.
But let’s be honest, we spend a lot of time invested in activities that keep us busy, but don’t exactly add value and life to our hearts. (The deepest part of who we are and what we believe.) If you are not aware, you will live your life pursuing certain aims that carry a degree of importance, but over time, will keep you from what really matters in the heart.
We know our lives are not perfect, but yet we invest so much energy making them look perfect, comparing ourselves to shallow standards and sacrificing blood, sweat and tears to “goals” that imprison us more than empower us.
More people are getting honest with their imperfect life, but at the same time, cannot see the beauty of what’s possible right in the front of them. The broken areas of their hearts have cultivated a disempowering perspective. Therefore, they cannot see the treasured relationships they can connect to, the preciousness of who they are and most of all, the infinite depths they can experience in their spiritual lives, and the authentic relationships they can have with others.
But most of all, too many are just settling. We settle for the shallow end and do the least amount possible, so we can just “get by.” Lowest common denominator… passive content consumers.
Too many responses to “how is your heart doing” are often shallow and far from what the life of the heart is all about. We mean well, but it’s easy to live all day from the shallow end, without giving room for questions that move us into a deeper life.
- Have I been able to receive and give love today?
- Am I able to sense God’s love for me?
- Am I making time to experience love, joy and peace?
- Am I aware of the predominant feelings I am experiencing?
- Am I dealing with pain in life effectively?
- Is my heart alive and fulfilled?
- How are my relationships? Am I connecting to people in meaningful ways?
- Is there genuine peace in my heart?
- Do I care more about others than myself?
- Can I make a difference in others lives today?
By no means am I encouraging you to go into a cave, stare at the wall and live a morbidly introspective life. That’s not healthy either. But what we are talking about, is how easy it can be to walk through life without much assessment for the life of your heart, or the depth of relationships that is possible.
So pause for a moment and ask yourself, “How’s my heart -Your Heart?” What are the signals in your life that are inviting you into a deeper heart connection, healing and awakening?
Source: Mark DeJesus/Adapted – BH