The healing power of God to transform us and build us up is an amazing gift. This healing work is available all throughout our life, leading us into deeper truth and changing us from the inside out. But If experiencing heart healing is such a wonderful gift and blessing, why do so many people avoid it in their lives? Here’s five areas to consider.
1. The Invasion of Pride
The work of pride takes on various forms, but its biggest work is to keep us from the humble posture we need. It can be easy to hide behind anything to avoid vulnerability or letting anyone see that we have flaws.
Why not just stop playing the games and get real about your life? Wouldn’t that make things so much easier?
The reality is, too many have spent so much time and energy building fortresses around their hearts, God and other people don’t have the ability to interact with the real you. Our pride elevates some kind of poser, an imposter or false self that wears a badge of success; as though you have no weakness or areas to grow in.
Yet the healing process will not override your pride. If you keep a humble heart, you will have everything you need to process transformation. But pride will cause resistance in your heart preventing transformation.
2. The Tolerance of Inauthentic Living
Over time, we can tolerate very shallow living in our relationships. Look at our conversations. Do we get past the weather, the latest news headlines and our latest purchases to have meaningful and authentic conversations? Are we able to express more than just our perceived successes and be honest about our struggles?
Do you have people that you are able to be 100% yourself around?
We must realize that the best version of yourself is when you are yourself. And who you authentically are can have struggles, battles and issues of the heart that you are working through. Modern society has elevated the appearance of success at all costs, we lost the beauty of authentic exchange; to settle for the shallow end of life.
But we wonder why we don’t see dynamic results when we have no entered the depth of what’s available?
Having a humble heart will build people that are authentic in their journey; those who recognize their need and invite others to join the journey with them.
Many people like to live in that river we call “De-Nile.” It’s the river of not wanting to deal with our issues and our struggles. We push things down for so long we we can’t even recognize them.
Denial has many ways it can keep us from the heart healing that is needed, but the biggest tactic is shoving down and suppressing pain, heartache and brokenness.
We rationalize this habit. We usually don’t leave our denial until a crisis arises or we hit rock bottom that we realize we need a deeper work in our hearts.
4. We See Weakness as Failure
Many believe that showing need, brokenness or weakness means you are a failure. You’re unsuccessful. Many people even believe that if we admit to struggle, we will be rejected in some form or another.
Yet in reality, we don’t realize there is a precious experience available for those that live with a vulnerable heart.
The current pull today is success and achievement, at the sacrifice of living emotionally and relationally healthy. It’s easy to ignore the issues of the heart while pursuing a sense of belonging and value through what we achieve. At the end of the day, we develop a definition of success that is not reflective of genuine success at all… we call genuine “success”, prosperity.
So we end up taking our weak and broken areas and hide them as much as possible. Yet we miss out on the jewels available when we stop hating on our weak areas and allow healing to happen. Our lives impact people at a deeper level and we actually gain massive strength.
Many need to make room for weakness and stop living like you have it all together. You haven’t arrived, and that is ok. You are in process and its a beautiful journey; especially if we authentically embrace it. In your weakness, there is a reliance you learn that cannot be taught in those places where you appear strong.
You become an authentic business person. You become an authentic parent. You become an authentic friend instead of giving people advice you don’t really even follow yourself. You drop the facade in your life and instead just share where you’re struggling and growing. You haven’t arrived but you’re on an incredible journey.
5. Fear of Vulnerability
Fear has become a driving force in people’s perspectives and decisions. Fear leads us to create fabrications of what we want people to see about our lives. We don’t want to look bad. We fear rejection, abandonment, we fear looking bad or simply fear looking stupid.
When you live vulnerably, fear has so much less of an influence because you are not playing games and wasting so much energy with relational presentations. You get to be free from the heart.
BH/ Adapted: Mark De Jesus