Can we have a moment of vulnerability?
Saturday a week ago I had a total meltdown. I was sitting in my bed, tears running down my face while I could not even put into words what was happening.
It was the moment I realized that this time of a crisis meant that I will most likely be home with my husband entering my 30’s without friends and family. That we will not be able to go on our 5 year delayed honeymoon in Italy with a short visit at Home (Germany) for a few days. It meant that I won’t see my parents, my family, my very loved nephews and niece (I had just met her in December) and my friends even though I miss them very much.
…Then I cried even more, because I felt selfish for crying in the first place.
My “problems” are nothing compared to people that don’t know how to pay for next months rent or food on their plate. People are losing family members, friends, co-workers, neighbors to the COVID19 and there I was…crying for ‘selfish’ reasons.
But are they selfish? I can’t devalue my own feelings because others have it worse. But what I can do is to allow myself to feel the pain, cry those tears, and have my husband calm me down. I wiped away the tears, took deep breaths (very many and very deep breaths) and rewired my thoughts. I am very grateful for the technology that will allow me to connect with my loved ones, I have my husband and my puppy with me, I don’t know anyone that is fighting for their lives or is seriously sick.
I am also very grateful for our mentors that always said “Have at least 6 months of expenses saved away in case of a crisis” and that we listened to their advice. I am very grateful that we have a coach, and that I allowed myself to have a meltdown when it was long overdue. And most importantly, I am very grateful that I have every one of you in my life!
I asked Melanie if I could share her recent post. I felt it was important for all of us to realize that it’s normal for all of us to deal with the fear and unknowns that times like these can bring up. I also have a second reason. Melanie and Tyler will be sharing the third installment of her testimony this coming Saturday at our EIS event, (Via Zoom).
Melanie’s ability to share, and be vulnerable at all, is in part, due to the process that she has been in with Tyler for the past couple of years. This Saturday she and Tyler will be sharing how their long term commitment to this process we will be presenting has changed their lives forever, and continues to bring perpetual change as they move forward.
Hope to see you there!