I’ve been seeing you for about two years now. You have always talked about the root systems that we all carry around, the majority of which go unnoticed unless we’re intentional about working through them. It has taken me awhile to get to that point, but the fruits that have already come from it are life-changing.
One of the biggest things I have struggled with has been my anger. Whether I was provoked or hiding insecurities I didn’t know about, it was something that always followed me. Not until I started counseling with you did I realize the damage I was inflicting on others, and the path I was heading down if I didn’t make the necessary changes.
Although you opened up my eyes to things I wasn’t seeing before, you were clear that I wouldn’t truly be healed until I dug up my root systems.
You recommended me to write letters of forgiveness to see where the roots were coming from. I’ll be honest, I dreaded this. I feared opening up to myself and wondered if it “would work for me and if I really needed to do this to be successful in business,”(not to mention my relationship). But writing things out has a powerful way of showing you what’s in your heart.
I was so surprised at the amount of emotional pain I’ve been carrying around. Once you and I started to go through these letters together I was amazed at all the root systems that I was blind to. I was slowly ruining the relationships in my life because of the unforgiveness in my heart. We’ve only just began to dig up these root systems, but I am already seeing the fruit of God’s work in me, especially with Shannon. I feel myself responding instead of reacting, and seeking to understand instead of blaming.
To experience this internal change that has been your biggest nemesis, can only be explained as the workings of God. It is a freeing feeling to know I am capable of becoming a better man and knowing that I don’t have to be a prisoner to my false-self forever. Thank you so much Bill. Shannon and I are forever grateful for your guidance.
When Dan and I began to attack these root systems through his excavational journaling, there were numerous roots that we exposed, one after the other. Roots of rejection, abandonment, anger, and more were all exposed in just the first sitting. The more we go on in this part of the process, Dan is already experiencing the freedom of not carrying the weight of all this around and causing him to act out in anger and self protection.
It’s pretty clear that if we don’t do this work we will experience broken relationships, but what about in our businesses, vocations? He is also seeing how this affects his ability to be authentic, and his real self in his business as well as in his personal relationships. When your emotional and spiritual growth is stunted, you simply cannot become the “real you.” That’s what Dan referred to when he said; “I don’t have to be a prisoner to my false self forever.”
Thanks Dan for sharing this. We look forward to looking at more of these realities this weekend at the “Root System” event!
BH – With Dan Weldon