“The worst thing in this world is wasted potential”
– This was the phrase that I heard every morning from my dad growing up.
Using this as my north star, everything in my life revolved around my potential. Thanks to this subconscious programming, I found myself constantly frustrated in endeavors that I would pursue….feeling like I would embark on a journey into a sport, craft, community, and after time would go by, I would frustrate myself to the point of being paralyzed. I’m not sure if anyone ever felt this way; being so overwhelmed with the task that you just stop.
The more I strived, the further away I got from any goal I had. Due to the fact that I was always striving to reach my “potential”, it always left an emptiness in my heart. What is “potential” anyway? An imaginary finish line or capacity in which I am supposed to somehow reach on my own? I always thought of myself as the master…the master of my life the master of my universe.
Everytime I would strive for my potential, I was getting fuel from the wrong power source.
My family always labeled me as a “worker”. I really hated this label, because it felt empty and cold. I learned, in contrast, that if I was working through my heart, my vulnerability, my strengths, through God, it would allow me to see things through the right lens, and I could discover and walk in my purpose.
I used to try and control my sessions with Bill (LOL). In my mind, as long as I took what I thought I should from him,( I am a Choleric), then it was a success. Little did I know that the more control I tried to have on my growth process, the further away I actually was from where I needed to be. Striving for potential and walking in purpose is not just two separate topics, they are two different planets. Allowing myself to transform, and actually surrender my “control” to God has allowed me to become in touch with who I really am, and syncs me up with my purpose.
My purpose is not burn out, it’s not stress, it’s not anger, its allowing God to work through me so I can be a vessel for him to allow me to sow into other people’s lives. That is the infinite game, the journey, not the destination. There is no metaphorical carrot dangling in front of me, because there is no such thing as reaching and striving for my potential. If it were not for Bill and EIS, I would never have had this crucial paradigm shift, or heart transformation. My entire life has changed from my relationships to my impact on the world, and I couldn’t be more thankful.
Thanks Matt. Your story continues to bless and inspire my heart. You reinforce the reality of God and Him having a purpose and a plan that is accessible to us all.
BH with Matt Donofrio