Are you a relationship recycler? What do I mean?
Simply put, so many of us do not deal with our underlying issues that keep us bound up, insecure, codependent, and broken – especially in relationships.
I married my first wife after drinking all my adult life and after 2 years of sobriety. No real bearings of who I was, what love was, or anything. The reason I married her? I literally did not think anyone else ever would.
This marriage was doomed for failure before it began. I was 32 she was 20. I had dragged all my dysfunction into this relationship thinking I was ok because I was sober. By the time I got married I didn’t want to get married, but I didn’t know how to stop the train.
I was recycling all of the previous broken relationships that I ever had into this one. I had soul ties all over the place. I didn’t know who I was. (Neither did she). My moral compass was non-existent. I didn’t allow my sponsor at the time to speak truth to me. I blamed her for everything, took no responsibility for anything. This lasted 2 years.
Then came Jesus.
After I gave my life to Christ, got right with God started to grow in that direction, ultimately joining New York City Relief, being in ministry, I believed that now I was really ok, because of where I was at and what I was doing. I met Steph. Well guess what? I dragged all my unhealed dysfunction into this relationship as well! I mistook the position and the gifts God gave me to help people, with his approval over my life.
So thought I was ok and when she wanted a divorce, I thought, what’s wrong with her? I’m a good guy, working in ministry, I’m good! NOT! I was EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE, dysfunctional, insecure and prideful, a jerk.
Unbeknownst to me, I was A RELATIONSHIP RECYCLER!
This time, I got the help we needed. This help was so impactful and life transforming and relationship transforming, it sent me back to school to learn how to help people with the same things that helped me. Over the years, this has evolved into what I call… The Process.
This is the title of my new book coming out VERY SOON! I, with the help of our EIS team are able to help people discover the same transforming help as I did.
Don’t be a relationship recycler. Learn to live and love genuinely, the way God intended!