We talk a lot about “embracing your brokenness”. What does that mean?
It means the parts of us that hurt, make us feel insecure, destructive childhood scripts, dysfunction, imperfection, etc., need to be “embraced”… meaning, we understand they are all a part of who I am. If I identify myself by them, I will be insecure, if I befriend them, I can discover the real me… with my flaws and imperfections.
As my friend Julie Signorelli said that exemplifies this: “Process with Progress allows you to love every version of yourself.” So, would I wait until all the stuff that I struggle with is gone to love myself, or can I love and accept myself now, as I am. (Unconditional Love). God loves us as we are, not who we “think we should be”.
Loving yourself unconditionally, is loving yourself the way God loves you. And ultimately, since you are created in God’s image, your intrinsic value is established. But you compare yourself to the people and the world around you and either disqualify yourself, or over-inflate your ego in response to it. To be free to be me, I must know my intrinsic value, and trust that I am enough at baseline. If I do not, I will always be insecure, striving to be something I am not, comparing, and worse, self limiting.
God offers us basically unlimited potential… limitations are imposed when we do not believe the basic truth that I am enough. And if I don’t believe I am enough, I may create a false self that I believe is more acceptable, but not accessable.
Do you find yourself feeling filled with self-doubt and short on confidence? Despite your accomplishments, do you feel like a fraud destined to be exposed? Do you feel that you don’t deserve lasting love and that partners will inevitably leave you? Do you stay at home, afraid to venture out and meet new people because you don’t feel you have enough to offer? Do you feel overweight, boring, stupid, guilty, or ugly?
Most of us feel insecure sometimes, but some of us feel insecure most of the time. The kind of childhood you had, past traumas, recent experiences of failure or rejection, loneliness, social anxiety, negative beliefs about yourself, not knowing your value, perfectionism, or having a critical parent or partner can all contribute to insecurity.
In embracing your weaknesses, you will find the strength to allow all of them to be transformed, not merely removed.