So here you are on your journey of discovering your authentic self, breaking generational curses, breaking the soul tie with your ego and learning who God says you are. Basically just riding your growth high and if you are really honest, you got a little too comfortable. You made space for old patterns to creep back in. Suddenly you’re humbled, you made a few choices that aren’t in alignment with your new journey and process of healing.
You discover how easy it is to slip back into your trauma patterns.
I remind myself that my ego is an addiction. It’s the addiction to my trauma responses that sold me the lie “it’s the only way to live; I must rely on my ego to keep me safe and survive.” You start to make compromises; you convince yourself you can allow old patterns back in, while metaphorically maintaining your sobriety. Now shame starts to creep in. Isolation is calling you back into its dark cave. Your pretty mask looks far more comfortable than admitting that you need a higher degree of accountability. Your “perfect” exterior feels much better than admitting you have made a few poor choices. Your mind is screaming “run!” The possibility of disappointing those who are so proud of all the hard choices you have made, becomes unbearable.
In this moment you have a choice to make. Will you succumb to the lies of the enemy trying to call you back into the place you so desperately fought to escape? Or will you choose to believe the promises of God and move forward?
We love to say growth isn’t linear when comforting others, but will we extend the same grace to ourselves? Will we choose to get honest, trust the people in our life to love us through it, and redirect? What if we changed our perspective and instead of running, we celebrate our ability to recognize our mistakes quickly, take ownership, learn, and move on?
Really think about that. You can do that. You can choose to love yourself despite your imperfections. To love yourself enough to keep fighting for your freedom. To remind yourself that your brokenness is what qualifies you. In this moment our growth is revealed and tested far more than when we made all the right choices.
So today I choose to see how far God has brought me. What would have made me run for years in the wrong direction, only misguided me for a few weeks.
This misstep on my journey revealed my growth. I had the courage to reject the mask, further cut the soul tie with my ego, and discovered it felt really good to let go of the shame and guilt that left me in bondage. After initially being uncomfortable, I grew closer to my true self and I gained newfound strength.
Our vulnerability, accountability, and submission is our weapon against pride.
Pride is the enemy to authenticity and freedom. Pride will have you believing you need the mask and you can find your way out of the mess alone, leading to survival techniques and coping mechanisms that never worked. Isolation leads to destruction and pride is the enemy of progress. Choose to love yourself enough to expose the lies.
I’m rooting for you! Whether it has been two weeks or two years you have the power to reject the lies of the enemy and move forward!
Your Friend on the Battle Line With You,