Consistent Self Control

People often use a variety of terms for self-control, including discipline, determination, grit, willpower, and fortitude. Psychologists typically define self-control as: • The ability to control behaviors in order to avoid temptations and to achieve goals• The ability to delay gratification and resist unwanted behaviours or urges• A limited resource that can be depleted Interestingly,... Continue Reading →

How Do You FEEL?

Use the wheel chart to help you "feel, deal and heal" the areas where your emotional life goes off center. "What's the matter?" ... "Oh... nothing." "No, really, what's up, you're quiet all of a sudden..." " No really it's nothing." " I know something is wrong... just tell me..." " Well... ok... I guess... Continue Reading →

Say What You Mean, Mean What You Say

Behavioral styles tell us that only about 18% of the population score high on the scale that favors assertiveness and dealing with things head on. These are people who thrive on conflict, will say what they think, don’t care who they offend (at times) and are bold in their approach. The remaining 82% of the population tends... Continue Reading →

Grieving – A Process

The 5 Stages of Grief & Loss - Grieving is a Process, not an Event. The 5 stages of grief and loss are: 1. Denial and isolation; 2. Anger; 3. Bargaining; 4. Depression; 5. Acceptance. People who are grieving do not necessarily go through the stages in the same order or experience all of them.... Continue Reading →

Does Life Owe You Something?

We live in a culture that barrages us with images of a life that all smart, attractive, successful, or otherwise good people are entitled to live. It’s a life of wealth, great sex, physical beauty, perfect careers, adoring relationships, great health, abundant comfort and lots of blissful photos online to prove it. Because of this,... Continue Reading →

Limiting Beliefs

"As a Man Believes in his heart, so he is." "We learn our belief systems as very little children, and then we move through life creating experiences to match our beliefs. Look back in your own life and notice how often you have gone through the same experience." –Louise L. Hay Start unearthing your own... Continue Reading →

The Rest of Peace

Not "Rest IN Peace... The Rest OF Peace. What do I mean? God tells us the He offers the "peace of God that passes understanding". This implicates a deep peace that we cannot think our way into, conjure up on our own, or gain externally. No, peace, in God's economy is something that He offers... Continue Reading →

Regulate Your Emotions

The processes by which individuals influence their emotions has been the subject of a wealth of psychological, and spiritual research. These processes may be automatic and without our awareness (closing our eyes while watching scary movies), or they can require our conscious efforts (forcing a smile before a talk, despite feeling nervous). While there is a myriad of methods we regularly... Continue Reading →

Protect and Deflect

What do we mean by "protect and deflect?" When we, for multitudes of reasons, will not or cannot accept something that challenges us, on any level, we may, choose to protect ourselves by deflecting the issue. How? One way is saving face. Another is blame shifting. Passing the buck. Shirking responsibility. Making justifications and excuses.... Continue Reading →

What Do You do with Pain?

You know the old saying, "Hurt people, hurt people." How true. When we are carrying pain from traumas from childhood, or other pain from rejection, or any reason at all, and we do not allow it to be healed, it's easy for us to "project" our pain onto other people. We can have a hair... Continue Reading →

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